A couple of us had a conversation last week about how to know if you’re close to failure when you lift or how to know if you’re training hard enough. 

The simple answer is, if you have to ask, you’re probably not close to failure, and we could probably stand to lift heavier lol. 

The longer answer is this, I think a lot of people are either going way too easy and not seeing results, or they think training hard means absolutely destroying themselves every single session. Neither of those is right.

Let’s talk about failure first, because it’s one of those words that sounds scarier than it is.

In lifting, failure just means the point where you physically cannot complete another rep with good form. That’s it. There are a couple of different types worth knowing about. *Technical failure* is when your form starts to break down even though you might be able to grind out another rep, your back rounds, your knees cave, something shifts that shouldn’t. *Absolute failure* is when you literally cannot move the weight at all. Full stop, nothing left.

Here’s the thing: we’re generally not chasing either of those in most of your training. And no, that doesn’t mean you’re going easy.

What we’re actually shooting for is around an RPE 8, which stands for Rate of Perceived Exertion. Think of it as a 1 to 10 scale of how hard a set felt. An RPE 8 means the last two reps were genuinely hard, like you had to focus, you had to work, but you got them. You *could* have done two more reps if you needed to, but if you did, you’d absolutely not be able to complete another rep. And when you rack the weight, you actually need to rest before you can go again. Not a casual 20 second breather. A real rest.

That’s the sweet spot. Hard enough that your body has a reason to adapt and get stronger. Not so hard that you’re grinding through ugly reps or torching your nervous system every single day.

A practical way to know if you’re hitting it: by the last rep of your last set, it should feel genuinely difficult and you should need to rest after. Not impossible, not casual. If you finish a set and think “I could have done five more of those no problem,” or hop straight into your next set, the weight is too light. 

If you can talk through your set, definitely not hard enough, and you need to go heavier. All my clients know lol.

If you’re losing form or feeling like you might die, it’s probably too heavy. Or, if your coach tells you that we aren’t going up, then we aren’t going up, and there is either a technical break or we think you’re at a sufficient weight for the day. 

Somewhere in the middle, where it’s hard but controlled and you need a minute after, that’s where the work actually happens.

Now, there is something to be said about training a little lighter in the beginning of a program where we’re trying to learn a new movement, or figure out what weight needs to be, but once we’ve got it, it’s time to rock and roll baby.

Training hard isn’t about suffering. It’s about giving your body enough of a challenge that it has to respond. You’re stronger than you think you are, trust that.